Yuck, you work in a call center?

A lot of people tend to look down on call center agents. They say all you need to do is talk English with a “slang” accent and you’re in.  Some say it’s not a real job since all you do is yak and you don’t need 10 percent of that thing between your ears to accomplish what you have to do everyday. Consequently, people hereabouts view working in a call center as something you do when bum-hood has bored you senseless, or it’s something you do while waiting for your board or bar or whatever exam.

It’s either they don’t know what we really do or idiocy has reached truly pandemic proportions.

Well to set the record straight, we’re not even allowed to use “slang-uage.” Professional choice of words is a must.  Slang is your choice of words (ex. kicks, instead of shoes…or bucks instead of dollars), not some type of accent. “Twang” (as in American twang) should be more like it. And again, to set the record straight, not all companies require you to say “innernet” instead of “internet” or “call sener” instead of “call center.” Neutral accent is most desirable although some newbies to the industry take it a little too far by coloring their diction with too much “twang” whenever they have the chance to do so. Can’t blame them though, I was like that when I was starting out. Maybe it’s the sheer exuberance of youth or one’s upbringing that causes them to behave as such. It is worth noting, however, that some people make the mistake of thinking that sounding “konyo” or “stateside” equals great English skills. Well, Jessica Zafra doesn’t speak with a “twang” but her mastery of the English language is beyond question.

As for those people who look down on call center agents, I have my own little theories on why they think that way: (1) They think earning a PhD or LLB or whatever title automatically means they’ve worked harder to earn their stripes, hence they are intellectually superior to the rest of the working, toiling masses;(2) They know someone who  never did well in school or dropped out of college or never got a job in line with his course but now makes more than them after finding work in a call center (3) They are no-nonsense, conservative non-smokers who despise the stereotypical image of the chain smoking, loud-mouthed call center agents who want to look “glamorous” while blowing smoke on everybody’s face all the while hogging  and clogging the sidewalk lanes en masse during breaks, lunches or “tambay” sessions which can happen 24 seven as call center schedules border on the insane (nocturnal, no longer cuts it). (4) They think we’re underworked and terribly overpaid; (5) Their parents tossed away a fortune  on expensive, reputable schools for their studies, and hunching in front of the pc and answering or making calls for 8 hours doesn’t sound like a dignified way of earning a living for them; (6) since most call centers espouse Equal Opportunity which most traditional companies won’t touch with a ten-foot pole, they think every tom, dick and harry with  half as much brainpower as a mouse can handily make it as a call center agent if and when they want to; or (7) They’d diss us just to draw attention. That’s because people swearing, hissing and hating them back seem to affirm their existence.

I admit, some call centers can be so lax as to admit people who wouldn’t do the industry any good; all in the name of equal opportunity or, most likely, just to put a little finger on the leaking dam of employee attrition which is the bane of every call center.

As for those who think call center work is a brainless job, try talking with the customer while analyzing or resolving the issue plus notating everything that’s being done while reading message blasts and listening to the ambient noise for your sup or seatmate’s voice in the background. Now try that on a technical support account like the one I’m working for right now which normally involves troubleshooting everything from computers to universal remote controls, DVRs to TV sets as well as (the most hated)VOIP line issues. Now try doing all that while pacifying an irate customer who’s been OOS (out of service) for the past few days now. Piece of cake for you? Send me your resume, we need people like you here.

And yes, I admit some “call center agents,” newbies and veterans alike, can be really all-around annoying. Mostly, it’s all about the affected (read:phony) English diction, cigarette smoking and attendant horseplay or loud, nonsense banter you get to hear everyday in public utility vehicles, along the sidewalks, in coffee shops, inside elevators or just anywhere within a hundred meter radius of a call center. If a person’s experience with call center agents exclusively involves encounters with this kind of behavior, I can understand the derision outright.  Don’t get me wrong, I’m a smoker too but I stay out of people’s ways — and ears — as much as I can.

Three days ago, I was inside this FX taxi in Guadalupe waiting for the cursed thing to fill up with passengers and take me home @ 7 in the morning. Since I was coming off a change in schedule, I lacked at least 4 hours of sleep. In fact, I was so sleepy I could categorically say I was able to sleep for a few minutes while waiting. Well it could have been longer had not the two ladies beside me started yakking loudly about their shift and about how they (mis) handled and insulted their respective customers just to get them off the phone. Lady A kept on insisting that all the customers are dumb and should thus be treated like children while Lady B made sure to recite aloud some of their required script/verbiage just to let everyone inside the FX know that “hey, we’re call center agents, look at us, we speak great english!”  I was not interested in their stories since I’m not into eavesdropping and I’m sleepier than Eeyore on Valium but their glaring “-th” problem and failure to differentiate the long “e” from the short “e” (things they were not aware of, obviously since they keep on repeating them) distressed and perplexed me beyond my wits.

But then, no one’s perfect.  Not me, and most certainly not  people like this one guy (whose insignificant name I forgot) who kept on referring to call center people as “”bobos”, “orcs” and “lowlifes” in his rambling, error-ridden, not-quite English, not quite Filipino farce of a blog punctuated with “chong”, “dude”, and “pare” every five words or so. This guy, in between boasts of jet setting, stupendous wealth and good education provided by his (unlucky? consenting? Indifferent?) parents,  has obviously made it his life’s mission to bash and insult call center people every opportunity he gets. When call center people leave comments or reactions on his blog, he’ll heap more “orc”, “lowlife”, “chong” “dude” and “pare” on his next post. I’ve never seen someone wield language with as much power and creativity as this genius I’m talking about.

Fact of the matter is, some of the smartest, most creative, talented, successful and well-mannered people I have known were people I’ve met working in the call center industry. That’s more than 4 years in outsourcing spanning 4 different call centers. Yep, I was also a hopper during my first year. No one is perfect but that doesn’t give anyone the right to diss EVERYONE on the basis of a FEW.

I’m not sure why he hates call center people that much. Maybe he applied for a call center post and was rejected owing to his hideous mangling of the English language. Maybe he was lonely and unpopular in high school,  or his girlfriend dumped him for a call center agent, or maybe a call center agent robbed his home, roasted his poodle and danced on its grave, or maybe, just maybe, he’s just in dire, crying need for attention. Whatever his motivations are, it’s a great ruse just the same: Start dissing people. Get them to react. Get them to hate you. Get more hits. You become famous (or infamous). Howard Stern put bread on his table that way. Be hated, get famous – the easy way.

Crying out ” Stay away from me all you baho callcenter orcs pare!” when they respond to his insults is a stroke of genius. Come to think of it, if that was just a parody, his posts would be absolutely hilarious, really. In fact, that sicko partly inspired me to write a post. Why didn’t I think of that first? I’m sure he’s got some deeper reason behind his obvious hunger for attention. What I’m not certain of, however, is the virtual forest of grammatical errors in his posts: were they intentional or not?  I’m not sure but it’s equally horrible and disturbing just the same. sample these lines I lifted from his blog profile: “callcenter are for losers!” and “I have this hate for the callcenter industry because some talents are being wasted.” What the Anglo-Saxons and Latins built for a thousand years, he was able to destroy in just a few words.

Again, I’m not  perfect grammar-wise but what the heck…

Well, if being cool and great and smart means talking and thinking like that poor excuse for a living thing, I’d rather be a dumb call center agent all my life.

A Filmmaker’s Quest to understand an enduring Filipino Myth

Filmmaker Jordan Clark and the author

I met Canadian filmmaker Jordan Clark recently on account of his documentary work regarding the Aswang Myth in the Philippines.

His work basically tackles the origins and social implications of the Aswang concept which has scared countless children to sleep and behooved unbelievers of the supernatural over the years. His aim is to understand the origins of the concept and its purpose in society from a rational perspective. In a larger sense, I believe “Aswang: a Journey into Myth” exposes the dark underbelly of the FIlipino psyche, what with our seeming need to believe in things out of the ordinary even though we are very educated and literate as a people.

During the course of filming, Jordan interviewed various personalities including medical professionals, eminent director Peque Gallaga and yours truly for their take on the subject matter. I personally believe the late Dr. Maximo Ramos, the foremost Philippine authority on the “Aswang Complex” in the Philippines, would have made for a very enlightening interview as well. Nonetheless, Jordan came up with a lot of interesting views and theories regarding the myth, my two cents worth included.

As I’ve made clear in my previous posts, the “intermediatist” in me believes in the possibility that some things beyond the realm of what is known, can and will exist whether we acknowledge them or not. Science without question has significantly improved the way we live and helped uncloud a lot of misconceptions that stem out of ignorance. But I also believe that Science, for all its triumphs and achievements is not perfect or infalllible.

Charles Fort, that father of paranormal investigation, has repeatedly jabbed at what he calls “Dogmatic Science” and scientific “priestcraft” which is no different from religion in its own absolutist tendencies and propensity to exclude “weird” information that fails to fit into the bigger picture. He slams the blatant theorizing that ignores facts in favor coming up with explanations that would fit perfectly into the neat, finite and rational world that scientific reasoning has built over the centuries.

As for me, I don’t hate science. I just hate dogma, religious or scientific, but I digress.

Jordan’s effort in trying to uncloud the myth is a laudable effort since it deals with a topic that is both sensitive and frequently misunderstood. I believe his docu film will cover quite an area of historical, social and cultural perspectives that spawned the whole Aswang phenomena, myth or misconception, depending on how you look at it. A lot of questions might be left unanswered but it won’t take away the inherent value of what will be revealed. As I’ve always believed, questioning is just the first big step towards the right direction.

Google Sketchup: 3D Modelling for Dummies

I’ve always wanted to do some 3D modelling and animation but I never had the patience nor the tools to begin with.  I’ve tried my hand at various 3D modeling softwares but I never got anywhere. Well, that was until at least about a week ago.

Google Sketchup is a free 3D modeling freeware that promises to get you up and running in a few hours. I never believed that. 3D is 3D and even for someone who has had some experience with 2D design software, going 3D is a bit like Columbus setting foot in North America for the first time.

I’m not being paid by Google for this but all I could say is two thumbs up. Indeed, a few hours into my first tentative attemps, I’ve come up with objects and shapes that more or less matched what I had in mind. The following are the first 3 models I made.

my idea of a small loft-type condo (missing SIMS2 badly)

my second model was for an aircraft carrier

my latest was for a battle tank (ah, too much WWII history on Wikipedia, I guess)

The last model took me almost 3 days to do. the tank treads alone took me more than 2 days to finish. The final rendering isn’t as impressive as those on other 3d programs but the simpleton in me really liked the basic fog-and-shadow effect on the last two models.

There’s a lot of things you can do with your finished model. You can even upload your models on the Sketchup warehouse for others to download and render to their liking. If you’re into architecture, you can create a 3D model of your building and upload it on Google Earth to get a 3-dimensional view of your house or whatever.

In my opinion, anyone who wants to give 3D modeling as a hobby should start with Sketchup first.